"Are we going in there?" Sissy asked with definite disdain.
"Well ... yes," Smash said. "We have to. The computer center is that way."
The others in the team were huddled together, watching Smash. He looked again at the gate. The smiley face grinned menacingly. Smash sighed and took a tentative step towards the entrance. He looked back. He took another step. He looked back.
"Well, come on!"
The huddle took a tiny step forward. "There's spider webs there," Joanie said. "I don't like spiders much."
"You didn't mind roaches all that much," Smash countered.
"Roaches ain't spiders."
Smash shrugged, turned and walked boldly towards the entrance.
Just inside the mouth of the cave was a long desk with a gate that blocked further penetration. A humanoid figure stood behind the desk, his skin a deep red. He had a small black goatee and horns. A pointed tail weaved and bobbed behind him.
"Can I help you?"
"You're the Devil!" Smash said incredulously.
The figure behind the desk blushed even redder.
"No, not quite. I'm just one of His humble helpers. But thanks for the compliment. Now, how may I help you?"
Smash caught his breath.
"I want to get in."
"OK. What's your password?"
"Password?"
"Of course; no one enters the system without a password."
"Well, I don't have one. I'm new here."
"Is that so? Well, I'm sorry, but no password, no access." The devilish guy turned back to his work, ignoring Smash.
"A-hem," Smash cleared his throat. "Excuse me, but how do I get one?"
"One what?"
"A password," Smash steamed.
"Here; fill this out."
The man handed Smash a sheaf of papers at least a hundred pages thick. He also handed him a pencil.
"Jeeez," Smash exclaimed as he rifled through the application form. Resigned, he sat down and began working on the forms.
An hour or so later, Smash handed the document back.
"There, I've done it. But why did you have to know what childhood diseases my great grandmother had?"
"The devil is in the details," he replied.
The devil thumbed his way through the document.
"Everything looks in order. All right, your password is ..." he looked around stealthily, then motioned for Smash to come closer. Smash leaned his head over the counter. The devil whispered the word "Smash" in his ear.
"That's it? That's my password? Sm-"
"Shhhh! not so loud. And don't forget it either. You'll be asked for it a lot while you're here. And there are some pretty mean customers back there in the pits. You forget it and they will tear you apart."
"OK, can I go now?"
"Sorry, your password has expired."
"Expired?! How can it be expired? I just got it!"
"This is Hell. What did you expect? You want things easy and reasonable? Go to Heaven!"
Smash hung his head.
"OK, OK. What do I do now?"
"Here." He brought up an old ADDS terminal, put it on the counter in front of him and turned it on. Words flashed by on the screen.
"Pick one that you can remember."
Smash concentrated. He saw the 'words' "zwwqty","qwerw","vbwej" and "koklwe".
"But that's impossible," he said. "These words don't make any sense. In fact, they're not words at all!"
"Well, that's true. They are specially generated to be meaningless in every human and non-human language ever encountered. But hey, that's the price you pay for security."
"Security! What do you mean, security? Why would you have to keep people out? Who the heck would want to go to Hell?"
The devil behind the desk just looked at him.
"Never mind."
Smash concentrated on the terminal in front of him.
Smash finally settled on a password that he thought he could remember. Strchs. He pronounced it 'Starches'. While he had been so engaged, the others had come in one by one, trying to find out what had happened to him.
"Do they all have to have passwords?" Smash asked.
"Well, they don't have to. They could use yours, but that's not recommended."
"Why not?"
"Because," the devil balked, "uh ... well, they, ah, wouldn't be able to send email to each other."
"Oh," Smash said thoughtfully. "But couldn't we just talk to each other instead?"
"Well, you could," the devil sneered, "but ..."
Smash didn't want to waste more time. Having decided that no one else needed passwords, they were ready to continue. He told everyone the password and how to spell it.
"Steven, how far is it?"
"Thiry yards, sir. Straight ahead."
Smash peered into the tunnel. It was like looking down a sore throat. The heat belched up from the depths in waves.
"It looks deeper than that!"
"It's just an illusion," Steven confirmed.
They walked along until they came to a fork in the tunnel. From the left hand tunnel came sounds of fierce inhuman monsters. The occasional ripping and tearing of flesh punctuated the cacophony.
From the right hand tunnel, no sounds could be heard.
"We'll go that way," Smash said, pointing to the right.
"Nope."
"What do you mean, 'Nope?'"
"I mean the computer center is to the left."
"Shit."
The reluctant party proceeded down the mouth of the cave. They could hear the sounds of some creature eating loudly, rending flesh and screaming madly as it chomped down on its meal. And the sounds grew louder as they walked.
Soon they approached the source. A large domed cavern loomed in front of them. At its center, a huge dragon-like creature filled the passageway, feasting on something that looked vaguely as if it had been human. The monster was easily 40 feet long.
"Well, what do we do now?" Smash asked.
"Go back?" Sissy offered.
"We can't go back now," Smash asserted.
"Ah, sir?"
"Yes, Teresa, what is it?"
"Just why is that? That we can't go back, I mean."
Off to the side, Blackfive was checking his instruments.
"Because, Teresa, we haven't found out what is wrong with this place."
"Is that important?"
"Of course it's important!" Smash affirmed. "The ship is caught in a tractor beam that we can't release it from. Besides, we've lost all communication with the ship so we couldn't beam up even if we wanted to. And besides that, this is an opportunity to go where no one has gone ..."
At that moment, the dragon noticed the group, stood on its monstrous hind legs and roared.
To be continued...
